Training Camp

WOWZA! WOW. ZA. 

What a JOURNEY this was for me! When I showed up at the airport (5 hours before I needed to be anywhere) I had several feelings

1.) I MADE IT

2.) Did I make it?

3.) Where is everybody?

4.) What’s going on here?

5.) I hope I didn’t forget to do anything before I left(I DID)

6.) I don’t what’s going to happen next, but I am expecting to be changed.

So, as I waited, I sat, looking through the journal that I brought with me that I’d last used while still touring with the Young Americans. It was surreal, looking back at where I was, what I was wrestling with, and what life looked like at that time. And I thought about who I was before I began that journey, remembering who and what was important to me, how I felt about myself, about God, about what my life would look like. 

I’ve changed so much since then. And I am expecting to be changed so much again through this journey. Just within those two precious weeks I felt this huge wave come crashing over me of life, and of truth, of goodness, and of LOVE! 

Love looks like snuggling with two girls through a very cold night between laughter that keeps you from crying!

It looks like helping somebody in their adoption journey!

It looks like saying the encouragement that crosses your mind as you interact with people!

It’s when somebody walks very close to you in the night when you forget your headlamp.

It’s being interested and invested in others, and receiving and reciprocating that.

It’s forgiveness!

It’s being seen as you are, with your weaknesses and imperfections, and being loved anyways. WITH THEM!! WITH!!!!! Not pretending they don’t exist, or desperately trying to hide them! I want to be loved for the whole of who I am, not just the good parts! I want to love others for the whole of who they are, NOT JUST THEIR GOOD PARTS! I want to be somebody who is willing to hold somebody else’s flaws lovingly, gently, and patiently. I pray on this everyday, and today especially.

       I woke up with a heavy heart this morning, hearing about yet another shooting, right on the heels of the disaster in Pittsburgh. I’m determined to listen to God, who I love who says:

“Be strong and courageous.

Do not be afraid or terrified because of them,

for the LORD your God goes with you;

He will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6

So I will don armor, heading into the world determined to love people, to not wait a second to love them, but to do so fiercely and passionately. It is an emergency, to be honest. I will not allow fear to steal the love I have been given. I will ask for courage and be dependent, allowing God to cover me in the places I’m unable to cover myself. 

More to come on love, training camp, fundraising, and all the other good stuff!